Hurt

To Hold Her…..

For a time you hold so dearly
in your heart a desire to hold them tight, visualising them running into your arms like in a vintage movie with a burning desire matching that of yourself…  As soon as you see them during the time that never seems to pass by…
But when that moment arrives, all we are left with are a few uttered syllables in an ever so dry mouth and a crooked smile of unexpectance even though it was very expected…
Why is it so that the heart starts to beat faster than ever, at that very moment…
And we are left with no strength whatsoever to just go up to them and hug them right…
I missed her every single minute she was away, yet all I had to give her was an awkward smile when I saw her…
The truth behind it was more painful than one would imagine, the horrors of a broken heart are way beyond the unknown and the answers to why this feeling is everlasting is still a question mark…
Everytime she smiles, my heart seems to skip a beat, a state of nirvana is what my soul describes it to be…

Her eyes, they twinkle like the light of a million galaxies was trapped in them at their mercy to show them light…

Oh and when she talks, I can barely concentrate on the words that she speaks, instead I lose myself in the oh so sweet sound of her voice my ears were meant to hear, Day and Night! 

Yet, Now just thoughts of holding her till eternity in my arms, haunt me…

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To Love….. #FWF @Kellie_elmore

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Love, one must that it almost hurts…

Everytime you look into your lover’s eyes…

Be able to listen, to their heartbeat in sync…

To the sound of yours, like an orchestra of the soul…

Let it hurt so much, that words no longer comply…

Only what their touch can satisfy, gratify…

And hold on to them, like your body holds all parts of you…

But let them not be controlled, like your mind does…

Let the sweet pain of their freedom, water your love…

To love so hard and clear, almost as if it hurts as much…..

Ghost Town…..

Ghost Town

Transparent shadows of the good times,
A cup of coffee and a dozen smoke dimes,
Filled the air of an awkward yet delightful thought,
Of you and me and a world for who, we once fought….

Happened, so as to what, is still a mystery,
A time was there, when we’d finalize the tapestry,
Spoke for hours, dreamt of what it would be,
Together we planned, to plan our togetherness history….

Remember that day my dear, once my love,
We walked by the sea, naked were feet, so calm and dove,
I held your hand and whispered caresses to your ear,
Of grabbing greys together, to loose that moment was my biggest fear….

That moment was lost and so were you, my hanse,
For which I craved once, or to just see you once,
An addiction of sorts, were you so sweetly mine,
My dream was touched, the garden to an abandoned mine….

It’s one of those times, when I walk through you,
In these images of our love, to look it feels nice to,
Wandering the empty streets of past, where walked we once,
Now it’s just me kicking stones, but still feeling your essence….

Where have you gone, come back and see,
Our world has changed, with no us, but just me,
The tulips have died and thorns have grown,
Standing I’m still, at the alter, wearing the tux I had worn….

Beloved…..

As I stroll across these lonesome gardens of vanity, searching for divinity,
 
The winds ruffle through my hair, I slow down my steps,
To think of the good times we had, smoking a cigarette,

I look upon the sky, and watch it go grey with a lightning in its eye,

It sure was something, a sign perhaps, telling me to stop thinking,

But I am an adventurous soul, I keep wandering amidst the ghosts of my past,

They talk to me, tell me what a change I have gone through since my days of grace.
 
The ghosts take me on a journey to see my past, and there I was standing in astonished embezzlement,

To see what called me, a child like character without any worries or guilt, but just a dream,
A dream to love, live and be loved, with such minimum expectations from the world,

But more faith in himself, I ask quietly…… What happened then?
Suddenly the room started to swirl, the leaves began to fly,

A loud noise of the lightning struck me, and there I was looking at an adolescent me,

In the arms of my beloved, I waked across the hall to take a closer look at her,

So beautiful, so pure just like a new born baby, born from the first drops of rain,

I feel exactly what I felt when I was there, at that very moment,

I remember I had promised myself that day, that I would stand by her no matter what,

And will do absolutely everything to keep that twinkle in her eyes intact, till I run out of my last breath.
 

The ghost slaps me hard, and the hall starts to swirl, the leaves began to fly,

A loud noise of the lightning struck me, and there I was gazing upon me a few years after,

Still standing with my beloved, but not in her arms, with moist eyes I look at her,

Standing next to me, so cold as if my tears are mere water, I stand in silence and look at myself,

So helpless, asking her WHY? Why did she do this, after putting my life at her feet,

Just to see her smile once, but she just stands there, with her hands folded on her chest,

Looking at me go away with my misery, I still have no answer as to why,

What did I do to deserve this, all I wanted was a little bit of love,

Someone who would take my hand, and say its going to be fine.

 

As I begin to weep staring at myself, my ghost says its time,

I land face first on the ground, just to realize that reality has hit me,

It was time, time for amendment, time for demolishing every memory of her,

But I couldn’t, I couldn’t do it, no matter what she did or I felt, that doesn’t

Change what I truly felt for her, from the blood in my veins to the mind insane,

They are all witnesses, to something way more greater than the self, Love.
Now I have changed again, I can see more clearly,

I still want to love, live and be loved, but I also will never forget you my beloved,

Till the last breath in body resides, you will be a part of me, intangible but feel so real,

I keep strolling in the lonesome gardens of vanity, searching for divinity.